First of all, let's remember the reason for the season. Christ was born for us and all that, and I am totally appreciative. Thanks little baby Jesus!
Anyways, after preparing a Christmas Eve dinner (originally planned for my grandmom and parents and I), that only consisted of the strained relationship that is my parents and I ... I am a little (read: pretty goshdarn) drunk, and quite thoughtful.
As kids, my big brother (whom I call "Bubs") and I used to always engage in viewing our very favorite film, A Christmas Carol (old skool 1951 version) with our dad. My dad always would say the same commentary, at the exact same moment; but that was part of the sheer joy of watching with him. We always would go to mass, had a huge Christmas Eve dinner with our beloved grandparents, and then would watch our movie. As a family with very few traditions, we took our movie as a sacred act. I bought a copy of the movie for my brother, dad, and myself ... just in case. My amazing, hilarious, chivalrous, old skool, flamboyant grandadddy who used to watch with us has since passed, but we still have to carry on his memory with stories of his old days.
Side note: Puppy, I miss the crap out of you ... I love thinking about our stories together and I genuinely know that Bubs and I were your favorite grandkids (honestly, no freakin competition) ... but I hate smelling B&B when we drink in your honor. Why couldn't you just like wine, cranberry and vodka, or something with a little sweet in it or something else? Anyways, you were the best damn grandaddy in the entire world and I miss you every damn day. You are my hero and the reason why it is impossible to find a man "worthy" of my love (and the like)Anyways, back to present day: my big brother went off and got married. He isn't spending the holidays with us, which I understand ... but am totally bummed about. He and his bride (my dear sister-in-law, A.) make a huge effort to chat with us on Skype (which absolutely BOGGLES my parents, whom are exceptionally technology impaired) on holidays ... but it just isn't the same. I genuinely miss my big brother watching that stupid traditional Christmas movie. And I really miss having him as my date to midnight mass at our old church. I hate being the only drunk member of our family attending midnight mass. Don't worry, we're Catholic, so I'm one of about 300 in the congregation who are inebriated.
Anyways, I was just thinking about how much I miss my big bro and about the old traditions of my years past. Additionally, I think about a text that I sent to my bestest friend growing up, Hillwee:
Dear Santa,Not to say that engagements aren't lovely. Some of my very best friends are married and/or engaged. But come onnnnn! Way to hit me when I'm down! What with not having a date to watch an old skool Xmas movie and go to mass with (ie: my brother)
Please don't "bless" me with more idiot friends who are engaged this holiday season, for the fear that I will vomit.
Am I that pathetic? Yes. Do I care? A little.
Merry Christmas to everyone. And I'm serious about remembering the reason for the season. Little baby Jesus is the shiz (in all seriousness) who was born for our sins. And I have a lot. Thanks, little baby Jesus.
Merry Christmas!! And as of December 26, happy birthday to the best friend ever, Miss Lauren C ... Christmas and your birthday are two separate holidays. I am just too lazy to discuss both. But I love you almost as much as little baby Jesus. Which means a lot.
Cat Lady, Carlton, and Mustacho (who were locked in my bedroom for 4 hours this afternoon so that my parents and I could enjoy our Christmas Eve dinner)